It doesn't matter what I write, I'll just think it's stupid later.

What a day it has been. Actually, it's been a busy couple of days. Something is sort of happening with my life so I don't have to be cynical and negative and sit around and do nothing all the time. Yay!

It's really hard being patient, and it's especially hard now that things are ALMOST happening but not quite. Also, I'm fairly terrified of the future. It's going to be hard. Also, also, why is this screen so bright? I really wish I could tone it down but this silly website insists on lots of white-ness. Maybe they're racist. That was my attempt at a lame joke. :)

So here's the dealio. After I posted and was cynical about my life, I decided to get up off my rear and do some stuff. I went and saw Cali and it was soooo much fun. Her children are adorable. Jocelyn is 14 months old, and just getting to the stage where she's exploring EVERYTHING. She's just learned to walk so she's constantly getting into everything and finding new and exciting things to put in her mouth. Lyla is three and learning a lot of new words, and using even more new words, even when she doesn't really know what they mean yet. And then it was just fun to see Cali. I think I am closer to her in some ways than I am even with my sisters. Goodness knows I see her more often than my sisters sometimes. We talked late into the night and then had fun making cake this morning before I had to leave to go to an orientation thing for substitute teaching.

Orientation was boring as all get out but I will hopefully be able to start subbing on Monday. But I won't because I randomly got an e-mail from a charter school I interviewed with before I went to Nauvoo called American Preparatory Academy. They didn't have an opening for me then, but apparently their woodwind teacher is going to quit and they would like me to come to an interview on Monday for the position. I am super excited about this. I reallllllly want the job, so hopefully they like me again and I can figure out how to be a good woodwind teacher. Eeeeeeeeeee!!!

And now for the best part of the day. I got to go see the President's Own Marine band play at a random High School in Orem. Like, the Marine band that's stationed in Washington DC and plays for the president. Some people have argued that it's one of the best bands in the world, and certainly in the United States. I don't know why they were performing at a random High School in Orem but I'm glad I got to go. Even cooler, I went with Rachel, Kelly, and Marsie, who are friends from Nauvoo. There's something about listening to really good music that makes me extremely happy, and this was really good. And when I say really good I mean professional grade, exceptional, oh my gosh it's so beautiful I'm going to die music. I need to find a band and join it so I can play again.

Ok I'm extremely tired, and my eyeballs are screaming at me, so I think this is going to be it. Hopefully I'll have good news to report next time I write. ") 

I'm going to try and start writing on here again, but I wouldn't be surprised if it doesn't happen very often...

Man, this website  has gotten more complicated since I created this blog waaaaay back in like 2009. How my life has changed since then. But a good change I think.

Having just returned from a short mission to Nauvoo, Illinois awhile ago (only a summer long, I rode around in a bandwagon and played my flute in the Nauvoo brass Band) I have decided that it is probably a good idea to start trying to document my life again, and I am way better at typing then I am at writing things down on paper so that's what I am going to do. The only problem with doing this, is that so much has happened that I feel like I need to explain that I get overwhelmed and just give up.

But hopefully this will be better.

I also really want to work on my writing, and I don't know of a better way to do that, then to write a journal-type thing. So we'll give it a go. And when I really don't feel like writing about my day, well, perhaps I'll write a short story, or make something up. As long as something gets written right?

Well. Here's my situation. I currently kind of hate my life but hopefully it will get better soon. See, I have now graduated from BYU Idaho, and after coming home from Nauvoo I find myself in one of those quarter-life crisis. I am not married, (And there are soooo many people who are judging me because of this, whether they do it consciously or not) nor am I seeing anyone, and so I obviously have no direction in life. (Because being married automatically makes you an adult with everything figured out...) I have moved in with my brother, living in Provo and I kind of hate it. But I don't know where else to go and Provo is a good place to meet people apparently even though I just sit in the house and do nothing.

I've applied to be a substitute teacher in the area and hopefully that starts soon. Maybe on Monday or sometime next week. Hopefully this part of my life passes soon and I will be less sadistic and have a more positive outlook on life. But let's end with something positive. Tomorrow I am going to go see my friend Cali who has two adorable children, and I get to hang out with her for awhile before I have to go try and be responsible again.
And I think that's how long this post is going to be today. The end. I have to take care of a baby.